It is better to leave it broken –relationships

Recovering from broken relationships-ten steps to recovery

 

1. Go through it, not around it

I realize the most difficult task for person with a broken heart is to stand still and feel the crack. But that is exactly what you must do, because if you go around some issues are tearing your apart inside, and then you will bump into them somewhere down the line. No shortcuts without its share obstructions.

2. Stand on your own

you must say “I don’t need anyone or anything to make me happy “that job is all my own, with a little help from God.it is my job to fill the emptiness, and I can do it-creatively and with the help of God.

3. Detach

 Avoid attempting to fill the void yourself by rushing into a new relationship or trying desperately to win your love back-this is essentially what detaching is all about. Low healing time, because when you rush you’ll crush.

4. List your strengths

The person must pull himself/herself up by saying “self, you have been sober for 20 years! Weaklings can’t pull off that! Here you are, alive, after those months of intense challenges, during the loss of your first daughter and stock market crush. Move on from this sadness and try to be productive individual in this world.

5. Allow fantasizing

Try to remind yourself of positive memories with that person and fantasize.

6. Help someone

Help the person who has the same problem like you and forget about you self for a moment, And, let’s face it, that in itself feels like a miracle on some days.

7. Laugh and cry

Laughter heals on many levels and so does crying. There are many physiological reasons that contribute to the healing power of tears.

8. Make a good and bad list

You need to know which activities will make you feel good, and which ones will make you want to toilet paper your ex-lover’s home. You won’t really know which activity belongs on which list until you start trying things, and stop checking out his Facebook and seeing that he has just posted photo of his gorgeous new girlfriend is not going to make you feel good and cut telephone conversation with his friends fishing information about him. Deleting all of his e-mails and voice mails, pawning off jewelry he gave you, laughing over coffee with new friend .

9. Work it out

Working out your grief quite literally by running, swimming, walking, or kick-boxing is going to give you immediate relief.

10. Love deeply again

Once our hearts are bruised and burned from a relationship that has ended, we have to options: we close off parts of our hearts so that no one will be able to get inside it again. Or we love again –deeply just as intensely as we did before.Henri Nouwen urges us to love again because the heart only expands with love we are able to pour forth.